Last night I was suffering and in great pain when I wrote about being a single parent and the pain of the other woman. By the time I finished, it was about 1:00 in the morning, and I was too tired to add a photo. This morning I reread what I’d written, cringing in some spots and struggling to decide how much is needed for honesty without posting too much, I left it the same as it had been minus a few typos and started to search for photos of suffering.Continue Reading
My ex’s girlfriend is the other woman in all our lives. Today she went to my son’s soccer game for the first time. I was unable to go and have not met her in the two and a half years she and my ex have been together, but it still hurts. It’s been a rough couple of weeks. I am physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted and this news just had me sobbing tonight.Continue Reading
Friday night I took Troy to see Moneyball, the story of Billy Beane, General Manager for the Oakland A’s. Billy Beane takes the Athletics, one of Major League Baseball’s poorest teams, to a winning season through analyzing statistics rather than doling out large paychecks. I liked that idea from the beginning, but didn’t expect much of the movie itself.Continue Reading
Being pregnant and abandoned opened my eyes to a world had not known before, and I am beginning Single Mom Smiling with an understanding of the world I could not have had before becoming a single parent.
I was five months pregnant with our fifth little boy when my husband suddenly announced he was leaving and moved out only a week later. Being pregnant and abandoned suddenly and becoming a single parent was a painful, shocking experience for me, and it is an experience I would not wish on anyone. It opened my eyes to things I had not experienced on such a level before: fear, injustice, humiliation, insecurity, exhaustion, and unspeakable pain.
Becoming a single parent also opened my eyes to things I needed to be responsible for, to poor choices I had made, to how I had accepted mistreatment, and to how deeply my decisions affect my children’s lives and the lives of those around me. These choices were by no means limited to the relationship I had with my husband.
More than anything though, this experience opened my eyes to my own value and to the incredible capacity of those around me to love me when I needed them most whether I deserved it or not. There are no words to express the gratitude I carry in my heart every day for so many who have touched our lives. I mean to keep my promise to pay it forward.