
Dear Dads,
Let me start out by telling you how loved you are. You are loved, beautiful, priceless, precious, powerful, and irreplaceable. Society makes a point of telling women of their worth, of their inner and outer beauty, but I’m not sure you Dads hear that often enough about yourselves. For that I am truly sorry. Let me say it again:
You are loved.
You are beautiful.
You are priceless.
You are precious.
You are powerful.
You are irreplaceable.
You have some big shoes to fill. Dads are expected to work 40+ hours/week and come home to family activities. You are expected to play ball with your sons and your daughters, do homework (and get it right!), have tea parties, and read bedtime stories. Dads are expected to mow lawns, fix cars, and balance the checkbook. Dads are expected to be strong men and sensitive creatures – often in the same moment.
I know I’m going to sound sexist with some of this and I know a lot of Moms do these things too (I was one!), but the truth is…
Dads, you have a special place in the home.
Moms are great for skinned knees and high fevers, for offering sympathy at goldfish funerals and for broken hearts. Moms can’t be beat for homemade cookies and birthday parties, play dates, and family scheduling, but Dads, Moms are just, well…
Moms are just Moms.
As much as modern society tries to make us all the same, as much as it tries to say women can do any job a man can do, as much as it tries to soften men and harden women, there is an truth we must face.
A Dad is something special. He cannot be imitated or replaced.
No one can throw down a family wrestling match like a good Dad. No one can grill a steak quite as well as you. No one can tell a joke (for better or worse) in just the way you can. No one can protect and lead your family the way you can.
I can’t imagine the pressures you face every day, temptations lurk around every corner in billboards, online, and even in the songs on your radio. Lures call out to you promising you an easier life, more free time, a better way to spend your money, a better person to give you heart and time to.
Society tells you you must be happy, but society neglects to tell you that happiness can’t be found in those things, that happiness is less about your situation and more about what is inside of you.
And society never helps you find that happiness inside of you. Instead it teaches you that your life is disposable, that your wife and children will be fine without you, that if you see your kids on a regular schedule and pay your child support, you are still a good enough Dad.
But that cheapens who you are; it cheapens who you were meant to be.
Perhaps the greatest injury surrounding the lie of the ‘good enough dad’ is not to the Mom struggling against time and money, nor to the children hurt and confused by your absence, but perhaps the greatest injury is to you Dad.
You believe you are disposable.
I can assure you, you are not.
You are not disposable.
You are not replaceable.
You are worth more than a percentage of your salary.
You are worth more than a few hours’ visitation each week.
Many Moms will step up and try to fulfill the roles of two parents. Many kids will adapt (but never get over) being raised without a Dad. Society will be forced to pay for expenses two parent families don’t face.
You may believe you couldn’t change, that life will be better for everyone, that it wasn’t your fault, but I will beg you to think differently.
You were made in the image and likeness of God, and in such, you have a unique God-given Power.
You are not perfect, but you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. Stronger in a way that cannot be bought with a gym membership. You are strong with mental, emotional, and spiritual Grace, with a power that comes to you only when you choose to seek it and develop it.
Dads, as a strong, faith-filled single mom who is making it, who is raising five strong, faith-filled wonderful, amazing boys, let me promise you…no matter how good a job I am doing, let me promise you, there is no substitute for a loving Dad in the home.
So Dads, though you are not told often enough:
You are loved.
You are beautiful.
You are priceless.
You are precious.
You are powerful.
You are irreplaceable.
You are needed and wanted full time.
To all the amazing men out there, raising their children in their homes, to all the Dads who honor their vows, who lead their families on the right path, and to those Dads who were left (yes, sadly, I know this happens too) thank you for striving to be More, for not accepting being the ‘good enough Dad.’
Thank you for being amazingly, wonderfully, powerfully you.
Other Posts about Fathers – Saint Joseph’s Day at Kaleb’s School
Check out: The video is okay, but I one the words and the meaning to this song.
Toby Mac – I Don’t Want to Gain the Whole World but Lose My Soul
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