Good men are hard to find. Any single mother of boys will tell you that! Well, I’ve got a slightly different take on the whole thing.
As the single mother of boys, I know the importance of finding good male role models. While their father still sees them a few hours each week, he has changed and is no longer someone I want my children to look up to or follow in the footsteps of. I can now say that with more sadness than anger. God knows his faults and they are not the focus of this post, so I will not include them here.
I want my boys to be men who love God above all else, to value family as the most precious thing on this earth, and to appreciate and protect our beautiful country.
How do I hope to raise good men?
First of all, I pray – A lot!
I also follow those beliefs as closely as I can myself. I’ve heard it said that, “A good woman is hard to find too.” Imagine that! If I want my boys to be good, I must be good. Children do not respond well to the old adage, “Do as I say, not as I do.”
And then I must find someone for them to look up to. The person with the strongest influence over a child is the same sex parent. That is a scary thought for me, and while I know the boys will be influenced by their father, I can be sure they are around plenty of positive male role models as well. One of the best places I’ve found to look is at the local Boy Scout Troop.
Okay, so no one is perfect and the uniforms are a bit on the goofy side, but Boy Scouts provide an incredible opportunity for boys and young men to be around other boys and young men with similar values. God, family, and country are the three main pillars of Boy Scouts and while it is nearly impossible to agree with everything a person says and does, I like most of what the leaders in my sons’ troops do and say.
I like that the leaders take time to get to know the kids and do things that I have no desire to do – like stab some poor slimy worm onto the end of a fishing line and sit beside a stream in the cold for hours. They also do things I don’t know how to do – like shoot and teach firearm safety. They talk about food preparation, hunting, and providing for your family and local food pantries. Boy Scouts also has a merit badge program which gets boys 6th grade through 18 years old exploring different careers, hobbies, and life paths with mentors.
Good men are not so hard to find if you look at your local Boy Scouts and, especially if you are a single mother of boys, your boys need those good men in their lives. Search your local Boy Scouts for a troop which meets your son’s needs. Each group has its own dynamic personality and you want to be sure to find the right fit. Starting early is also advisable. Cub Scouts meets the needs of children as young as first grade.
Keep praying for the men in your life and the men in your boys’ lives too – including their father. God Bless… _____________________________________________________________________________________
SMS Tuesday posts deal with family issues especially those concerning children and how to help them through your family’s trauma.