Friday night I took Troy to see Moneyball, the story of Billy Beane, General Manager for the Oakland A’s. Billy Beane takes the Athletics, one of Major League Baseball’s poorest teams, to a winning season through analyzing statistics rather than doling out large paychecks. I liked that idea from the beginning, but didn’t expect much of the movie itself.
Sometimes having no expectations is a good thing and I found myself really liking Moneyball although for different reasons than most people would probably ever have considered. So much of my life has become about being a single parent. Sometimes I cannot get the yuck out of my head and even when having fun, the trauma of the past few months quietly sneaks up on me. I had fun at the movie but caught myself drawing unlikely parrallels to Billy Beane and the lives of single mothers.
I’m sure that seems like a stretch so bear with me…
While Billy Beane seemed so overly confident, in truth, he believed himself to be a jinx who would hurt the team, so he never watched the Oakland A’s games. Then the Moneyball theory began to payoff. The Oakland A’s were ahead 11-0 in the fourth inning of what was to be their 20th consecutive win when Beane could resist no more. He whipped his truck around, raced back to the stadium, and slipped quietly, unnoticed, into the stands.
Immediately the A’s made error after error; Billy Beane left the stadium with his head down.
Billy Beane, illogically, blamed himself for the difficulties the team faced. With Beane gone, the A’s eventually came back and won, and the theory that he had caused the team’s failure was cemented in Billy Beane’s mind.
How many times have you in your relationships, marriage, and life believed the illogical? That you are the cause of all life’s problems? That you are not good enough?
I cannot count the number of times my ex told me that he had an affair and left so suddenly because of something I did. What’s worse, is that after hearing it often enough, I cannot count the many more times I believed him and told myself the same thing.
I can see how illogical this is in the lives of Billy Beane and others, but not in my own life. For a long time I was Billy Beane, and some days I still struggle to beat down the nagging doubts telling me that I am not good enough. That it is all my fault. That there is something wrong with me.
But I am not that Billy Beane and neither are you.
We all have faults. None of us is perfect, but our worth is immeasurable, not because of who we are but because of who God is and because He made each of us. You must accept how special God made you and rise to that. Do not let those who persecute you control your thoughts. You may have been rejected and hurt or done wrong in your past, but you were made to be strong and good and wise in the Lord.
Do not doubt His goodness and or sabotage His plans by allowing let yourself be the negative side of Billy Beane.
God Bless…
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How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.
1 John 3:1
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