It takes a brave or desperate woman to get her story out.
Over the years since I began Single Mom Smiling, several women have contacted me with their stories, stories of abuse, abandonment, fear. Some of those women have given me permission to share their stories and to help others before me get the word out about domestic violence, divorce, and struggle.
Tara wrote to me about a month ago and later sent me this as her way of telling her story. I have edited little – only changing locations and names and attempting to break up the writing into paragraphs for easier reading.
I hope that, by sharing her story, Tara, and others like her, will realize they are not alone, that they are cared for and Loved perfectly. Please take some time this weekend and each day to pray for these women and children because…
We are truly one Body in Christ.
There But By The Grace Of God Go I…
I was married for 9 years to a man we had 3 boys together. He was going to be a physician Assistant and even got accepted to W where we all moved in order to give our boys a better life. The last 5 years of our marriage he became very abusive, drinking and taking drugs. While in PA school things had gotten worse.
We were only as a family given 20,000 as a school loan to live off from. So I decided to join school myself so we could pay bills also I wanted to be a teacher. Well my ex’s drinking/drug problem became worse. I was so depressed I could barely function, he also became very abusive. One morning I woke up with a huge bruise on my head and a concussion, I was throwing up and he was screaming at me because he had to miss school to take me to the hospital. Eventually he was threatening to kill me and hiding my thyroid pills on me, I had to get a PPO on him.
At one point my mom and Dad took me and our three boys to go live with them back, I thank them every day for this. During all this I was able to stay in school online through the University of Phoenix while working doing hair barely making it. The boys could only see their father through supervised visits, I had and still have all rights and full custody of my boys. I loved school and was doing well even with all of the other stress of being a single mom and raising three boys entails. But at one point my computer had a virus in it then shut down completely and broke. My only option was to buy a new one which at that point I could not afford one. Also things were getting tough me working going to school raising three boys on my own living of 12,000 a year was just weighing on my body and soul.
So I dropped out of school got a second job, 6 months later they asked to a start up financial payments with me. What they had offered were payments I could not afford, I was told the low payment was the lowest they could go and that was still too expensive.
That same year in fact I had to file for bankruptcy, I thought the student loan was included in the bankruptcy. I can send the bankruptcy paperwork. I have full custody of three boys I make 17,000.00 a year for the past three years my income tax returns have helped me survive.
Please I am begging you to have mercy and return my tax return money it helps pay bills and get the boys school clothes also various other things baseball.
I know I made a bad choice in my husband. Please do not let my three boys suffer. I know you are a big federal place and I am just asking for a second chance maybe you could forgive my loan debt, if you could do that I will go back to school to become a PA so my children will not have to grow up poor.
I am crying as I write this letter. I and other single moms we are so tired out and with the world weighing on our shoulders our children’s future at stake many of us buckle under all of the pressure. I am fully aware that it is my full responsibility and my poor decisions and judgment that have brought me to this awful point. But you as well as I know money scholarships things you and people of wealth can provide would solve a multitude of my stress. You have the power to say yes please do.
Single Mother of three bright, beautiful boys, Law Abider, if had the money I would change the world and help other single mothers.
17,000. a year
Consumers 200-300 a month
Boys clothes 1500 a year
Gas 200 a month
Van insurance 160 a month
Daycare 20 a day with state help when boys are not in school
I am on food stamps and Medicaid.
For my introduction to Tara’s Story, please click here.
Join me in praying for Tara’s family especially Sunday at your local church but also every day and for my response to Tara’s Story on Monday, May 19, 2014.
If you would like to share your story, please contact me using the form below.
- Nam’s Story (added July 18, 2015)
- Anna’s Story (added June 18, 2015)
- Tara’s Story (added May 17, 2014)
- Amy’s Story (added November 27, 2013)
- S’s Story (added December 11, 2013)
- Heidi’s Story
- Kyley’s Story
- Iba’s Story
- Alice’s Story
9 thoughts on “Tara’s Story”
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Pingback: "Found" - By Tara Jean - Single Mom Smiling
August 12, 2011 at 12:53am
Look in the mirror I dont recognize my own face
tired eyes, pale skin my smile is out of place.
I look around no-one understands
alone? 3 boys to hold my hands
Might be a struggle might be hard
I look at my hand not one good card
But I have 3 boys who look at me
to show them the way.
3 boys who love me, hug me at the end
of my day.
People talk people snicker people judge
but they wont wave me and I wont grudge
Im going to fight! Do the best that I can do
Trust in God find my path, my cue
Im sure you are all perfect and have not made
So go ahead laugh, judge talk about me see
my stregnth, Im tall -no shakes.
Some of you think I took the wrong road
but this is what I needed a heavy load
It made me who I am me strong independent and caring
You wont meet another woman not afraid of life Daring
So watch out world naysayers and cats
I keep my eye on the ball not on your bats
This website is a monumentally important outreach to single/divorced Catholic women and children. Prayers and generous compassion for families ravaged by divorce are urgently needed. The financial and emotional hardships faced in these circumstances are so overwhelming. It is at these times that we trust in the miraculous love of Jesus.
Thank you so much Lora. I often doubt myself, thinking I have said too much or said everything wrongly. Your encouragement means more than I can say. I also hope Tara realizes how much her coming forward helps other women. I hope she and others realize there is real support and encouragement that, even when they sometimes feel isolated, they are never alone. God is always with them. There is a place in God’s family for them. Jesus’ unconditional Love is truly supportive and miraculous. It is in Him that we gain Hope and strength to overcome seemingly overwhelming obstacles. Thank you Tara. Thank you Lora. Than you Jesus.
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